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Burn After Reading (2008)


Genre: Drama/Crime/Comedy

Starring: George Clooney, Frances McDormand, John Malkovich, Tilda Swinton, Brad Pitt

This is precisely what happens when various different people get involved with each other unnecessarily and just end up screwing up their lives. Osbourne Cox (Malkovich) gets fired from his government job and is writing a book. Seeing his hopeless situation, his wife Katie (Swinton) wants a divorce. Chad (Pitt) and Linda (Mc Dormand) work in a gym. They both find Osbourne's CD with his half-written book and other confidential information. With Linda wanting to collect money for her cosmetic surgery, the duo get over-enthusiastic and use it to extort money from him. Linda is meanwhile dating Harry (Clooney) who is also sleeping with Katie and Harry is about to get a divorce from his own wife. Chad and Linda hand over the CD to the Russian's (For no reason whatsoever) since they seem to be the more sinister types. One thing just keeps leading to another and everything becomes one big mess. The light hints of sarcasm in the movie is simply amazing. You cant expect anything less from a movie with such an awesome star cast. Malkovich just adds a different flavour to every abuse that comes out of his mouth. A definite one-time watch, but as the dialogue in the end of the movie goes "What do we learn Palmer?" "Well I don't know sir" "Neither do I, but I guess we learn not to do it again". Burn after reading? Burn after watching.

Thumbs up: Brad Pitt and John Malkovich
Thumbs down: A few dragged scenes here and there

Rating: 7.1/10
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Broken Arrow (1996)


Genre: Action/Crime

Starring: John Travolta, Christian Slater, Samantha Mathis

Major Vic Deakins (Travolta) and Capt. Riley Hale (Slater) are doing a top secret military drill carrying nuclear warheads on their plane. Deakins and a whole lot of others from the military are actually involved in one large conspiracy to steal the nukes and extort money from the US government. Capt Hale has taken up responsibility to get those nukes back from Deak and save Utah from becoming a barren nuclear wasteland. With him is Terry (Mathis) a park ranger, who senses something wrong going on in the desert and sets out to find out what it is. The movie is actually quite boring when compared to modern day cinema. The story is something highly old and overused. The movie doesn't have the thrills and the action sequences are also nothing you can go back home and talk about. That said, I must say that John Travolta is the best person who can carry off a pair of aviators.

Thumbs up: Improves your knowledge on nuclear weaponry to some extent
Thumbs down: Might have been appealing when released, but not anymore

Rating: 5.9/10

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Tropic Thunder (2008)


Genre: Comedy/Adventure/Action/War/Spoof

Starring: Ben Stiller, Jack Black, Robert Downey Jr., Jay Baruchel, Brandon T. Jackson, Tom Cruise


What do you call a war movie spoof that goes miserably bad? Tropic Thunder. A war movie funded by multi-millionaire Les Grossman (Cruise) is not going anywhere. The movies two big stars, Tugg Speedman (Stiller) and Kirk Lazarus (Downey Jr.) are having ego clashes. In order to get things straight, the group of actors are dropped into the jungles of Vietnam and the entire movie is to be shot using hidden cameras. The shoot goes badly wrong when the director gets killed by a landmine and the actors are spotted by the Vietcong who kidnap Tugg and hold him for ransom. The movie is not even stupidly funny and the spoof was tried to be created by over-dramatising the already over-dramatic scenes usually seen in war movies. Tom Cruise can easily pass off as unidentifiable if it wasn't for the end credits. His role seems minor and insignificant. Jack Black is probably the only person in the entire movie that you would want to laugh at.

Thumbs up: Ben Stiller and his genes for stupidity
Thumbs down: Lacks humour, boring at times

Rating: 4.7/10
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Whats Your Raashee? (2009)


Genre: Romance/Drama/Comedy

Starring: Harman Baweja, Priyanka Chopra, Darshan Jariwala, Anjaan Srivastav, Rajesh Vivek

Harman Baweja needs to publicly admit that he cannot possibly act. His futile and lame attempts at it make the movie an even bigger bore. Yogesh (Baweja) hails from a Gujarati family and is happily settled with an MBA in Chicago. According to his horoscope, his family learns that he is the receiver of a large sum of money on the night of his marriage. In dire need for the money, his family calls him back and asks him to get married within the next 10 days. Understanding his family's urgent need for his 'predicted income', he agrees to start meeting girls but insists that he meet only twelve girls, all belonging to different sun-signs. Enter Priyanka Chopra, playing the role of the various prospective candidates. She is perhaps the only good thing about the movie and even wonderfully manages to execute two of the twelve characters amazingly. Unfortunately though, both these characters are the most horrendous looking but demand the most effort. The movie becomes a bit over-dramatic at certain places. Each of the twelve sun-signs represent twelve possibly different types of people, not just with respect to looks, but family, income, nature, needs and requirements. The supporting cast managed to give the movie a very 'gujju' feel to it. Harman Baweja desperately tries to be in league with the current crop of 'cool and young' actors. To give him some credit, he has some really amazing dance moves. The movie has the potential to do well, but small niggles bring it down drastically.

Thumbs up: Priyanka Chopra, the support cast
Thumbs down: Harman Baweja, certain irritating songs

Rating: 4.7/10
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Definitely, Maybe (2008)


Genre: Drama/Romance/Comedy

Starring: Ryan Reynolds, Abigail Breslin, Elizabeth Banks, Rachel Weisz, Isla Fisher


Will (Reynolds) is a divorcee and his daughter Maya (Breslin) has recently received sex-education at a very premature age. Bursting with questions, one thing leads to another and Will ends up narrating her his love-life prior to her birth. He changes all the character names in his story so that Maya cant know which one is her mom. The story goes on to narrate Will's juggling love-live with Summer (Weisz), April (Fisher) and Emily (Banks). The movie is very simple and neat and unlike other romance movies, isn't loaded with sex and lame teen jokes. Very few movies base the story on a daughter-father relationship. It reflects to some extent, the typical urban American lifestyle. Ryan Reynolds nicely manages to switch roles between a college graduate, lover, to-be husband and a father. A movie that might just appeal to everyone and to some extent even to the romance hating ones.

Thumbs up: Clean and neat storyline, good performance
Thumbs down: Light humour would've been appreciated

Rating: 7.4/10
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Gladiator (2000)


Genre: Action/Drama/History/Adventure

Starring: Russell Crowe, Joaquin Phoenix, Connie Nielson, Djimon Honsou

The Romans conquered almost all of Europe. They wanted to free the world of barbarians and bring about civilisation. What they didn't realise is that there lifestyle was quite barbarous itself. Maximus (Corwe) a general serving the Roman Army, was chosen to be successor by its then ruler Marcul Aurelius. This did not go down well with his Marcus Aurelius' son Commodus (Phoenix) who murdered his own father. Marcus was banished from the empire and became a slave. His fighting skills brought him under the ownership of an entertainer, who made him a gladiator to fight within the Colosseum at Rome. The people of Rome loved him and he soon won the heart of the mob and of Lucilla (Nielson) Commodus' sister. Maximus was a noble servant of Rome, and wanted to end the era of monarchy and make Rome a republic once more. He only wanted to fulfill the wish of deceased king, whom he honoured and loved. The Romans lived for honour, and that was brought out well in the movie. The good part was that the character of Maximus was not shown as an invincible hero, with insane fighting abilities and the power to do anything. The movie on the other hand lacked the inspirational feel and felt a tad too lose. A more heightened climax would have helped to a certain extent.

Thumbs up: Russell Crowe, character costumes
Thumbs down: Needs a bit more drama and energy

Rating: 7.9/10

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Up (3D) (2009)


Genre: Animation/Adventure/Drama/Comedy

Starring (voiceover): Edward Asner, Cristopher Plummer, Jordan Nagai, Bob Peterson

Up forms a part of the current crop of 3D animated movies hitting cinemas. Two small kids Carl and Ellie share a common passion for adventure. They soon get married and live a happy life. Years pass by and their dream of having a house on Paradise Falls, South America remains unfulfilled. Soon after Ellies death, Carl (Asner) decides to fulfill Ellie's last wish and converts his house into a giant flying thing, by tying together thousands of helium filled balloons and takes off into the sky. To accompany him, he has Russell (Nagai) an over-enthusiastic wilderness boy scout who simply wanted to help Carl cross the road and win himself a badge, but lands up becoming a part of his maniacal adventure and Doug (Peterson) a dog with a talking collar, who is a part of a pack of strays belonging to the ex-explorer Charles Muntz (Plummer) who is currently in South America searching for a rare bird since years to prove its existence to the world. After watching a 3D movie after probably years, i was left a little disappointed overall. Apart from just adding some amount of clarity, the 3D effect was seem to have been added simply as a marketing strategy and attract more viewers. Lift your glasses and watch the regular version and its just as good. The movie was a little slow to start, but the moment his house took off, you knew the actual movie has now begun. The movie was never meant to make you laugh, an essential for all animation movies according to me, but it makes up with an amazing adventure packed and thrilling tale that might just leave you teary-eyed in the end.

Thumbs up: Nice story, character detailing
Thumbs down: 3D is pointless

Rating: 7.6/10
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Transporter 3 (2008)


Genre: Action/Crime

Starring: Jason Statham, Natalya Rudakova, Francois Berleand, Robert Knepper


The third installment in the Transporter series, Frank (Statham) is doing his usual business; transporting goods in his brand new black Audi and no questions asked. Like all movies, this time too the goods is human. A freckle-faced Ukranian girl, Valentina (Rudakova) whose father is a minister of environmental protection to be precise. Johnson (Knepper) wants Valentina's father to allow his ships carrying toxic wastes to dock. If not, then Valentina would die. Frank has to transport Valentina across Europe and just to be sure, Valentina and Frank are tied metal devices on their wrist which will blow up if the get further than 75 feet from the car. Part three is no different from any of the earlier versions, only difference being his client, the cargo and the car. What doesn't die out however, is Jason Statham's complicated fist maneuvers which makes this movie different from other action movies. It has its own set of insane and out-of-this-world stunts, but that's what the movie is entirely relying on. If you want to watch this movie to see what is different in it, then there is nothing. The only reason to watch it is the pure love for action.

Thumbs up: Amazing bare-fist action
Thumbs down: Nothing different from its predecessors

Rating: 6.0/10
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Blow (2001)


Genre: Crime/Drama

Starring: Johnny Depp, Penelope Cruz, Paul Reubens, Jordi Molla

All dope movies seem to be the same. Telling you not to dope and what happens when you do too much of dope. When you see Johnny Depp in the star cast, you know for sure that there is something very different in this movie. Based on a true life story of George Jung (Depp) a small time drug dealer, that later went on to become one of America's biggest cocaine dealer. His parents kept fighting with each other since there was no money in the family. He promised himself that such a day would never come in his life, hence he took the easy way and started selling dope on the streets of California with the help of a gay supplier Derek (Reubens). He went on to marry Martha (Cruz) but things never worked out for them due to his regular jail visits and his inability to give up the dope. The movie in the end focuses on family ties and relations and the miserable state George is now left in. The movie doesn't try beating around the bush, nor does it get too deep and psychological. Just keep it plain and simple.

Thumbs up: Johnny Depp and the entire star cast
Thumbs down: Johnny Depp's horrible hair style

Rating: 7.3/10
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Philadelphia (1993)


Genre: Drama

Starring: Denzel Washington, Tom Hanks, Antonio Banderas

Once in a while you come across a movie after which your loss for words. Simply writing a review and trying to make someone explain the sheer brilliance of the movie is not worth it. Andrew Beckett (Hanks) is a supreme lawyer working at a very reputed law firm. All of a sudden he gets sacked for incompetence and negligence. Andrew is convinced that he was removed because he is a homosexual and has contracted AIDS. He hires Joe Millers (Washington) a previously rival lawyer, to represent him in the court of law and sue his employers for firing him for the wrong reasons. Many duplicates of this movie were made in multiple languages and countries world over, but none were as successful as the original. The only explanation for this, is the brilliant Hanks-Washington unbeatable on-screen performance. Stop reading this review and go watch it if you havent.

Thumbs up: Amazing courtroom scenes
Thumbs down: Zilch, zero

Rating: 8.1/10
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Freddy vs. Jason (2003)


Genre: Thriller/Crime/Fantasy/Mystery/Action/Horror

Starring: Robert Englund, Ken Kirzinger, Monica Keena, Jason Ritter, Kelly Rowland

As soon as the movie kicks off, you feel as if your watching the trailer of a horror flick that badly went wrong which slowly turns into the impression that your about to watch a horror spoof and eventually you realise that the movie is very serious on scaring you. Freddy (Eglund) was a child serial killer, who was burnt alive by protesting parents. Now in hell, he gains his power from the fear that people have for him. Over time, the people of Springwood have eradicated this fear by using drugs and medicines. Four years later, Freddy resurrects Jason (Kirzinger) to kill some more people and make them fear him once more. However, Jason goes a little overboard with his killing and Freddy decides to stop him and finish him off for good. In the midst of all this brutal killing are caught teens Lori (Keena), Will (Ritter) and Kia (Rowland) who have watched their friends die and go all out to end this massacre. The movie has some very gory and bloody scenes. Although it has the 'horror' tag attached to it, the movie hardly makes you flinch and that comes from someone who cannot stand horrors at all. The first half makes you wonder why you've even bothering with it, but give it some time and the movie manages to gain your interest. Definitely not meant for someone looking for thrills and shivers.

Thumbs up: Good action, although gory
Thumbs down: Bad attempt at being scary

Rating: 6.0/10
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District 9 (2009)


Genre: Documentary/Science-fiction/Action/Thriller

Starring: Sharlto Copley

There is a stark difference between making a documentary and making a movie. What happens when a hybrid of the two occurs i.e. 'a purposeful or fake documentary'? An alien mother ship enters earth and halts atop Johannesburg, South Africa. The million-odd aliens from within the spaceship are rescued and are given housing accommodation in District 9, Johannesburg. Over two decades pass, the housing soon becomes an alien slum, with the aliens feasting off trash like scavengers. Human tolerance levels fall, and people start protesting against the aliens and want them out of the city. Vikus Van De Merwe (Copley) is an officer working at MNU, an arms manufacturing company. His company has been contracted with the assignment of forcibly evicting the aliens to a new a location and Vikus is the field operator in-charge. During his eviction spree, he gets exposed to alien fluid which slowly starts altering his bodies genetics and transforms him into an alien. He suddenly becomes the most sough-after individual on the planet, since alien weaponry can only be used by someone who has the aliens DNA. He befriends an alien, Cristopher Johnson and has a deal with him. The alien will make him human again, only if he can get hold of the fluid, currently in MNU labs and escape from earth. The movie wonderfully creates an almost real-life visual, with in-between interviews with alien specialist. One actually comes close to believing that the incident did actually take place, but was kept closely under wraps. It gives a whole documentary feel to it, but keeps switching to 'movie mode' every now and then. Almost anyone would today scoff at the idea of 'alien rights', but the movie makes you realise that if such a day would arrive for human beings, what sort of an ugly scenario might befall us. Although the movie moves very slow, it is still a very interesting watch, simply because it is very different from conventional movie making concepts.

Thumbs Up: Combo of documentary and movie
Thumbs Down: A bit slow, gory scenes

Rating: 7.4/10
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A History of Violence (2005)


Genre: Drama/Crime

Starring: Viggo Mortensen, Maria Bello, Ed Harris


Tom Stall (Mortensen) is leading a happy life with a well-settled diner in a small American town. He has no reasons to complain and is loving the way things are going until an incident at his diner brought him into the media spotlight. After his new found fame, Carl Fogarty (Harris) decides to pay him a visit. Fogarty knew Tom as Joey Cusack, an ex-mafia henchman and starts inviting him back to his old life at Philadelphia. Tom is content with the life he has and doesn't want the secret of his past get to his family. He tries avoiding it by lying to his wife Edie (Bello) and his kids, but realises he cant hide the truth for very long. The movie is plain boring and seems to pointlessly wander around with no real objective. It makes you wonder why you actually even bothered with it. I expected some sort of twist in the end which would change his life forever but was sorely disappointed.

Thumbs up: Viggo Mortensen
Thumbs down: Bland and boring

Rating: 4.9/10
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Bad Boys II (2003)


Genre: Action/Crime/Comedy

Starring: Will Smith, Martin Lawrence, Jordi Molla, Gabrielle Union

Not in sequence with the previous movie, Mike (Smith) and Marcus (Lawrence) are cops belonging to the Tactical Narcotics Team of the Miami Police Department. Drug lord Johnny Tapia (Molla) is transporting drugs from Cuba in dead bodies and coffins and the cop duo have to bust his racket. Only this time, Marcus' sister Syd (Union) turns out to be an undercover cop working for the DEA who is also on the tail of Johnny Tapia. The movie is filled with the same black humour, and seems to carry forward the same style and rhythm that prevailed in the earlier movie in spite of having an 8 year gap between them. There is more adrenaline rushing action this time, which seems to play a more important role, rather than having a sensible story line. Considering the amount of cars they've trashed, buildings blasted and people killed, they look more apt for the SWAT team rather than an anti-narcotic team. A definite improvement over the earlier movie, but still way past the mark.

Rating: 7.0/10
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Night of the Day of the Dawn of the Son of the Bride of the Return of the Revenge of the Terror of the Attack of the Evil, Mutant, Alien.... (1991)


Genre: Thriller/Comedy/Spoof

Starring(voice): James Riffel


Night of the Day of the Dawn of the Son of the Bride of the Return of the Revenge of the Terror of the Attack of the Evil, Mutant, Alien, Flesh Eating, Hellbound, Zombified Living Dead Part 2: In Shocking 2-D. That, is the entire screen name of the movie, and it also holds the record for the longest movie name ever. The sole reason to watch this movie is this factor only. The movie is a spoof of George Romero's 1968 classic horror Night of the Living Dead. The sound and dialogues have been removed and replaced with James Riffel's own voices. All characters in the movie have been voiced by him, including the police dogs. Quite obviously, the dialogues are stupid and nonsensical and don't add to the movie in any way. A group of people get trapped inside a house one night, when hordes of zombies are freely marching on land, threatening to eat up everyone. The movie is constantly interrupted by 'Profiles in History' which are short clips on pointless trivia about a historical person. Another interruption is some person holding a card apologising to George Romero for insulting his masterpiece. All criticisms aside, simply wiping out all dialgoues and replacing them with something insanely stupid, is a very tough job by itself. The movie is definitely not worth even a single watch, but if the title length still nags you to watch it, then please go ahead and don't say nobody warned you.

Rating: 4.8/10
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Bad Boys (1995)


Genre: Action/Crime/Comedy

Starring: Will Smith, Martin Lawrence, Tea Leoni

Mike (Smith) and Marcus (Lawrence) are police officers working in the narcotics division of the Miami Police Department. A load of confiscated heroin from the police quarters get stolen and Mike and Marcus are assigned the case to bring it back. Julie (Leoni) is a police witness who sees the thieves that stole the dope, murder her best friend. To save her life, she is put into protective custody with Marcus. A case of switched identity is the highlight of the entire movie and adds to the comical factor. The focus is little on crime and more about the stupid antics of the cop duo. There really isn't too much in the movie to watch out for. Will Smith and Martin Lawrence make a good pair, and their stupid black humour is probably the only to thing to watch in the movie. Tea Leoni though, looks gorgeous, and considering the fact that the movie is over fifteen years old, its not a big surprise.

Rating: 6.6/10
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Igor (2008)


Genre: Animation/Comedy/Fantasy/Science-fiction

Starring (voice): John Cusack, Jay Leno, John Cleese, Eddie Izzard

In the peaceful and prosperous town of Malaria, everything is well until a dramatic climate change alters citizens' life for over. King Malbert (Leno) announces an annual competition, where scientists can make evil inventions of mass destruction and the most destructive of all will be pronounced the winner. This was to be one of his ways of improving the economy. Any person who has some kind of deformity, is made to become an Igor. They are to be slaves and perceived as someone stupid and lacking intelligence. A certain Igor (Cusack) serving Dr. Glickenstein (Cleese) is quite smart, and when an experiment kills his master, he takes over his masters dream of making the most destructive monster. Being an animation movie, it is supposed to appeal to young kids. However, even my nine-year-old brother gave up just half way through. The movie doesn't incorporate any comical elements and becomes plain boring. Animation and special effects are up to the mark, but don't really help in making the movie any more appealing. Igor's sidekicks, Scamper, the immortal bunny and Brain, are the only characters that actually try to make you laugh.

Rating: 5.5/10
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Valkyrie (2008)


Genre: War/Crime/Drama

Starring: Tom Cruise, Bill Nighy, Kenneth Branagh, Tom Wilkinson

Adolf Hitler, the dictator of Germany aka The Third Reich, bringer of the second world war. He strived hard to give Germany something it had never had before. Nobody doubted his love for his country, what they doubted were the means he was using to achieve his vision. Valkyrie narrates the failed attempt at Hitlers life. Apart from just re-telling the assassination, it brings out the point that even within high-ranking officials within the Nazi Party, many would rather see him dead, not to bring power in their own hands, rather to rid Germany of Hitler altogether. Colonel Stauffenberg (Cruise) is said to have headed the 15th known attempted at Hitler's life along with General Olbricht (Nighy) and a host of other top-ranking Nazi generals and officers. The only focus throughout the movie is on the assassination, and there are no unwanted side-stories to fill in time. The only flaw in this movie that one can remove is the multi-national star cast, whose fluent English in strong American and British accents, do not give a 'German' feel to the movie. More use of the German language with a German star cast, playing lead roles would probably have helped the movie a lot.

Rating: 8.1/10
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Gulaal (2009)


Genre: Crime/Drama

Starring: Kay Kay Menon, Ayesha Mohan, Raj Singh Chaudhary, Abhimanyu Singh, Aditya Srivastava, Jesse Randhawa


Dirty politics. Dirty, stinking politics. Dirty, stinking, rotten politics. Dileep (Chaudhary) an innocent young man, comes to Jodhpur to further his education. He gets ragged by Jadwal and his goons along with his lecturer Anuja (Randhawa). Dileep's roommate Ransa (Singh) makes him retaliate against them but of no avail. Dukey Bana (Menon) a powerful local figure and revolutionist, wants a free Rajputana and wants to go against the very idea of democracy. Dukey Bana intervenes the battle and offers Ransa to stand for the college General Secretary's post. Against Ransa, Kiran (Mohan) fights for the same seat. With Ransa appearing as the apparent winner, Karan (Srivastava) Kiran's brother and Ransa's illegitimate brother kills Ransa. Dileep is made to replace Ransa and becomes General Secretary. Dileep is still new to the idea of politics, and gets mislead along the way, causing him to take some unpopular decisions and tie alliances with people whom Dukey Bana doesn't approve of. The movie has an interesting soundtrack and the lyrics if closely listened to, offer a lot meaning and maybe even a laugh or two. The characters in the movie did justice to their roles which seems to come from within. The lack of any big star presence in the movie did not become its weak point. The movie rightfully portrays each and every persons own hunger and greed for money and power. Anurag Kashyap also does away with gory and bloody scenes, that his earlier movie Black Friday was criticised of. Perhaps if it wasn't for a few over-dramatised scenes, the movie would've been a more pleasant watch.

Rating: 7.7/10
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His Girl Friday (1940)


Genre: Drama/Comedy

Starring: Cary Grant, Rosalind Russell, Ralph Bellamy

The movie portrays the environment prevailing in the journalism and newspaper industry during World War II. Newspaper editors would go to any length to create news and to keep it from falling in the hands of rivals. Walter Burns (Grant) is the editor of The Morning Post. Hildy (Russell) is an ex-journalist at The Morning Post and Walters ex-wife. One day when Hildy pays a visit to Walter to announce her wedding to Bruce (Bellamy) Walter smooth-talks Hildy to come back and interview a convict about to be hanged as one last task for the paper before she resigns for good. Hildy on the other, knows every trick in the book and knows exactly what is going on behind Walters mind. The convict however, manages to escape after the interview and causes a whole lot of confusion for the police, the mayor and the journalists. Cary Grant does a brilliant piece of acting, typical of a classic American actor. He is probably the only reason the movie dosen't feel like one big drag. The movie did create box office ripples when it was released, but unlike other classics, doesn't appeal to audiences of today. The movie has a lot of dialogues over lapping each other, characters talking fast-paced and before the other person finishes, giving a very life-like feel and journalist feel. Although the movie is classified as a comedy, it hardly makes you smile and the jokes would not actually make sense to people of today, as they are direct insults of the events happening during the war.

Rating: 5.0/10
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